How to stop breastfeeding

Breastfeeding is very individual, and there are many different approaches – some people breastfeed for a long time, some only for a while, and some not at all. However, regardless of your preference, everyone has to stop eventually, and depending on when you want to stop breastfeeding, there are a few different things to consider in order to make the process as smooth as possible for both mother and baby.

How should you stop breastfeeding?

The best way to stop breastfeeding is to wean your child off the breast gradually. In other words, you remove one feed at a time from your routine, instead offering your child some other food (if the child is under six months of age, the breast milk will need to be replaced with infant formula). After a week or so you can remove yet another feed from your routine, and so on, until eventually you have phased out breastfeeding completely. This gradual phasing-out process enables your milk production to decrease naturally and also makes the transition less dramatic for your baby. Our little ones also tend to start growing tired of breastfeeding when mum’s breasts are no longer producing as much milk.

Is there an ideal age for children to stop breastfeeding?

The best time to stop breastfeeding is when both baby and mother want to stop, which often occurs naturally as the baby becomes more interested in other types of food. But deciding how long you want to continue breastfeeding is a very individual choice, and something that only you and your baby should decide.

If you (as the mother) want to stop more than your baby, it is a good idea – if possible – to try to choose a time in your baby’s life when there aren’t also many other major changes occurring at the same time, as breastfeeding provides a lot of comfort and security for your child. For example, there tends to be a lot happening around the age of 7–8 months with regard to children’s development, and your child may therefore be a little more anxious and have a greater need for closeness during this period. If breastfeeding is the best way to calm your baby, it may therefore be wise to consider whether it is possible to keep providing breastfeeds a few times a day – but you must of course also consider what is best for yourself and your family life in general.
It is important to be aware that, from the age of six months, breastfeeding alone is no longer sufficient for your child – it is from this point that a baby also needs to receive nourishment from other types of food as well – but your breast milk can continue to be part of your child’s diet as long as there is no reason to stop breastfeeding completely (or unless you want to stop).

Stopping breastfeeding early

Some people already feel and know prior to or immediately after giving birth that they don’t want to breastfeed at all, in which case they give their newborn baby formula instead. Of course, all new mothers produce breast milk, even if they don’t intend to breastfeed their baby, and they can expect to have sore and heavy breasts for about 1–2 weeks, but their milk production will decrease by itself quite quickly. It is also worth knowing that it is unusual to experience blocked milk ducts during the first ten days after giving birth, and there is therefore less risk of complications if you stop breastfeeding immediately – otherwise this can become a problem for those who have breastfed for a while and then want to or must stop.

Sometimes, those who have started breastfeeding may wish to stop early, perhaps due to complications such as constantly sore breasts, or because the baby hasn’t really managed to find a good sucking technique or breastfeeding simply doesn’t feel good. In this situation, depending on the reason, you can either seek help in trying to solve the root cause (for example, the baby’s sucking technique or tongue-tie), or else you can stop breastfeeding. The general advice is always to stop breastfeeding gradually if possible and, if the baby is under six months of age, to transition to infant formula instead at a suitable pace.

Stopping breastfeeding abruptly

It is best not to stop breastfeeding abruptly if possible, as this increases the risk of experiencing problems with your breasts and can also be very discomforting for your child. But sometimes a situation can arise in which factors such as illness or medication complicate matters and mean that you can’t actually continue breastfeeding your child. Perhaps you find out that your baby can’t tolerate breast milk, or perhaps you must suddenly start taking a type of medication that isn’t permitted to be taken when breastfeeding. In such circumstances, it becomes particularly important to focus on proper breast care for a while, to reduce the risk of blocked milk ducts or mastitis. Usually, it is necessary to pump out breast milk to begin with, in which case you should only pump a small amount at regular intervals in order to relieve the pressure; in other words, don’t pump so much milk that your milk production constantly continues. Some people require medication to stop their milk production, in which case the relevant medication must be prescribed by a physician. It is also important to bear in mind that your baby is likely to have a greater need for closeness for a while if you stop breastfeeding abruptly, as breastfeeding is a direct source of comfort and security for a child.

It should also be remembered that many situations in which you are temporarily unable to breastfeed your child can be resolved with pumped breast milk in a bottle, after which you can recommence breastfeeding when possible. In other words, just because you must work during the day or take a trip without your baby, it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to stop breastfeeding – unless you want to.

Stopping breastfeeding your baby to sleep

The evening breastfeed is often the most difficult feed to remove from your routine, for the simple reason that breastfeeding often becomes a habitual way for babies to fall asleep, and this is perhaps also a time when your baby is usually in need of a little extra “TLC”. You may simply be forced to accept that this is still the easiest way to get your baby to sleep in the evening and that, for the sake of everyone in the household, it is best to continue with the evening breastfeed for a while and instead try stopping other feeds during the day at other times when your baby is due to sleep. Then, if you succeed in your attempts to get your baby to sleep during the day in other ways, i.e. without breastfeeding, you may perhaps have found a winning concept that you can also use to stop the evening breastfeed! Otherwise, it might be worth trying a few other methods of getting your baby to sleep without the need for a breastfeed, for example:

• Try introducing porridge before the evening breastfeed so that your baby is full.
• Try to find other bedtime routines, perhaps a bath, a little massage, a lullaby and a favourite stuffed animal.
• Try breastfeeding your baby a little earlier than usual in the evening so that he or she still stays awake afterwards. Then, after a while, when the signs of tiredness start to appear, you can simply try putting your child to bed without a feed.

Stopping breastfeeding at night

Many people become very keen to stop breastfeeding at night, for the simple reason that a lack of sleep starts to be unsustainable. How you tackle this issue could, to some extent, depend on how old your baby is and how badly you are being affected by a lack of sleep. Babies need nourishment at some point during the night – often until they are six months old (give or take), but sometimes even longer. However, there is nothing to say that this nourishment must always be provided via breastfeeding, and if you have a partner or some other adult in the household, it could therefore be a good idea to try letting someone else bottle feed the baby with pumped breast milk or formula during the night. If your child is a little older and you feel that it is time to stop breastfeeding at night, you don’t have to think about providing alternative forms of nourishment during the night – but be prepared for some vociferous protests to begin with, as breaking a comforting habit is not easy for a little one.
It may also be wise to not be overly stubborn if it means that you run the risk of ending up in an even worse situation than before, for example if all your attempts to stop breastfeeding at night simply result in long hours trying to comfort an upset (and not sleeping) child, and an even more tired parent in the morning. In such circumstances, it can often be better to simply recommence night-time breastfeeding and try stopping again in the future. It may also be possible to find a way of breastfeeding your baby at night without causing major disruption to your own sleep – for example, you could try establishing a routine whereby you breastfeed your baby just before your own bedtime.

Eight tips on how to stop breastfeeding

1. If possible – choose a time when life feels a little calmer. Time it so that your baby is not sick or affected by a lot of other major changes in life. Try not to rush things; instead, let the weaning process take the time it needs.
2. Stop gradually. Slowly reduce the number of feeds in your routine – perhaps you can remove one per week. A gradual phasing-out process is usually best for both mother (i.e. your breasts!) and baby.
3. During a transition period, things may be easier if someone else can bottle feed the baby. Naturally we understand that there aren’t always two parents in a family, but if the possibility exists, it is usually easier to get a baby to accept a bottle from someone who isn’t armed with his or her favourite breast!
4. If your baby is older than 6 months, try introducing him or her to other types of food during the day. Some people try using the BLW method, whereby the child is allowed to choose what to eat (from a selection of nutritious foods) from the very beginning, while others use spoon feeding – or a combination of the two methods.
5. Does your baby like porridge? If so, try giving him or her a little porridge before it is time for a breastfeed – the fuller your baby is, the less interested he or she will be in breastfeeding!
6. To reduce the amount of breast milk, take a hot shower and lightly stroke your breasts, or lean over a sink filled with warm water and dip your nipples into the water. This will cause some milk to flow out by itself. However, try to avoid massaging, hand-milking or pumping, as this will stimulate more milk production.
7. See if you can find other ways (than breastfeeding) to comfort your child – a favourite stuffed animal or a dummy can sometimes be an adequate substitute for your breast.
8. Contact a children’s health clinic for help if you’re finding it difficult to stop breastfeeding. A physician at the clinic will also be able to prescribe medication to inhibit your milk production if it is not decreasing as it should.

What happens in your body when you stop breastfeeding completely?

Quite a lot happens in your body when you stop breastfeeding. Your hormone levels change, which affects your body in a number of different ways – some can be positive, while others can feel difficult, and there are also a few complications that can arise.

Your hormones change when you stop breastfeeding (H3)

When you are breastfeeding, your body produces, among other things, more of the hormone prolactin, as this has the role of stimulating the production of breast milk. Prolactin also inhibits ovulation, which in turn causes a decrease in your oestrogen levels, and it is low levels of oestrogen that can give rise to the classic breastfeeding hair – in other words, you may become a little thin-haired. But don’t worry – after you stop breastfeeding, the oestrogen in your body returns to more normal levels, and you can then start to get your normal hair back. Another potential effect of the return to higher oestrogen levels is getting your sex drive back, although it is important to be aware that other factors also have a role to play in this regard, as our sex drive is quite closely linked to sleep, which is not something that new parents usually enjoy an abundance of!

When you stop breastfeeding, you also experience a decrease in the hormone oxytocin, which is our “calmness hormone”. However, the nice thing about oxytocin is that it is also produced in other ways, for example through intimacy, cuddling and skin-to-skin contact.

Blocked milk ducts and other side effects of stopping breastfeeding (H3)

Your breasts may leak quite a bit to begin with, so cups or pads could be a good idea if you want to avoid wet spots on your clothes. However, this leakage is transient. A slightly more troublesome complication of stopping breastfeeding is that you could experience blocked milk ducts. It is far from certain that you will get this side effect, although the risk increases if you stop breastfeeding too quickly or if your feeds become very irregular. Here is a link to an article in which we have gathered a little advice on how to avoid blocked milk ducts (and how to manage the situation if it arises), which you can read at your leisure to prepare yourself.

Many people can also find it very emotional to stop breastfeeding. For some, it perhaps feels like their freedom is returning, while for others it can feel extremely depressing – stopping breastfeeding is a decision that can often evoke conflicting emotions. Of course, this is all completely normal. A feeling of sadness when you finally stop breastfeeding could be due to many different things. Perhaps, in reality, you weren’t really ready to stop this early? And regardless of how ready you were, just the thought of never again putting your beautiful little baby to your breast is, of course, something that can evoke extremely strong emotions. A wonderful chapter in life is coming to an end – and when you add in no small amount of hormonal change, it is hardly surprising if you find yourself feeling sad and low. However, things should start feeling better again after a few weeks, but if they don’t and you feel that you are suffering more than just a temporary dip, you should seek help, for example via a children’s health clinic or your local medical centre. It is good to get help early if you find yourself in this situation, so that you can dispel any negative thoughts and rediscover the joy of life as a parent.

Please note that all information above is based on Swedish recommendations.